Pagan Dilemma – to Come Out or Not

So, I have a dilemma. I stand at a crossroad and I know which path is the right to take, but I hesitate anyway. I don’t know why I can’t take those little steps, it’s like something’s stopping me. It’s a crossroad of faith, a question of whether to open the broomcloset or not.

The reason for my ambivalence has eluded me. I’ve no idea what’s so scary. I’ve read through this post at the Moon and Shadow blog, and I still don’t know why I’m not “coming out”. None in my family will react strongly negative, it will not affect my job and I’m prepared for how it will effect my life. Well perhaps not fully prepared, but who is? How can you be fully prepared for something unknown?

The question is whether to connect my blog to Facebook or not. Most of my close friends know I’m pagan, or at least that I’m very into incense and colorful clothes. It started with a beautiful pagan song that I wanted to post on my blog. But since the lyrics says ” I am pagan, and I’m proud”, I couldn’t get myself to do it.

Yes, I’m a proud, eclectic pagan. But can I put this song on my blog without daring to connect to facebook? Perhaps it’s silly, but I feel like a hypocrite singing this song and then hiding what I believe at the same time. Especially when most people won’t be surprised by this blog.

I will meditate on this tonight, perhaps pray to Hecate, she is the Goddess of Crossroads afterall. But I know the choice is my own, I would still feel better meditating and praying before doing anything.

What do you think?

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7 Comments

  1. Asynja said,

    September 7, 2011 at 9:47 pm

    My advice would be: Wait a little longer, until you feel certain of what you want.
    You can always add information later, but you can never remove what you’ve told people about yourself. From then on the will know. There is no erase button.
    But as you said: It’s no ones choice but yours…
    All I can do is blabber about a bit, offering more or less useful advices. 🙂

    • Vaettr said,

      September 7, 2011 at 10:19 pm

      Asynja: Yes, that is my thought as well. And your words are so true, there’s many times I’ve regretted telling someone something about myself. But then it’s been about hurtful and bad things. Now it’s about something that I love and feel passionate about. Perhaps it’s a fear about not being taken seriously or something. I don’t know, but there’s some insecurities I have to sort out before I do anything.

      frootbat31: Yes, I truly need to meditate on that. You can’t hurry things like this, it needs to come on its own. Thank you for liking my blog, it makes me really happy you think so!

      Thank you both for the advice and support!

  2. frootbat31 said,

    September 7, 2011 at 9:59 pm

    I agree with Asynja. Wait until you’re certain. Its important to also understand where your reluctance is coming from.
    You have a lovely blog here, by the way. 😉

  3. Diandra said,

    September 8, 2011 at 10:38 am

    If you do not feel comfortable with letting everyone know everything about you just yet, that is perfectly fine. Some days I hesitate when I write something about a topic that might raise some eyebrows or questions, but I have made it a rule not to think about my readers or what they might think while writing. However, I do understand that this is not the path to go for everyone, and that is perfectly fine. You should not force yourself to show people something that may be new and precious to you. Just wait and see what happens. (And yes, people do react strange from time to time. Enjoy it, you’ll be making lasting impressions. ^^ )

  4. OWLTHENA said,

    September 8, 2011 at 1:18 pm

    I think you should let the process evolve slowly, add a link here and there, an article now and again that is of interest to you and what you are comfortable with on your public pages , before long it will no longer be an issue but something about you that others will have grown to be comfortable with.
    I am not out to all, but then I believe my spirituality is personal and no one elses business, those that know about me are open minded those that don’t are not and I let it be.

  5. Resa said,

    September 8, 2011 at 10:35 pm

    I did more or less what Owlthena suggested and while a few of my very Christian acquaintances from my long ago high school years defriended me, no one that I consider or have ever considered a close friend did. I think some of my more enthusiastically Monotheistic friends simply choose not to notice. That’s okay with me.

    I got to your blog through a convoluted set of clicks, from That Witch is True via Magick and Mayhem. So, random passerby comment-hugs to you!

    • Vaettr said,

      September 8, 2011 at 11:21 pm

      I think people already knows and are just waiting for me to get my act together. I mean I have trademark smell, people say I smell like Solkristallen, which is the local “witchcraft” shop. I use bindis and I wear a pentagram ring, so I think people have a pretty good clue that I’m not christian or atheistic.

      Haha, random is fun! A big hug right back at ya! ❀

      Cheers!


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